How To Forgive Someone Who Hurt  You-Ego Creates Suffering

How To Forgive Someone Who Hurt You-Ego Creates Suffering

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How to forgive someone who hurt you? That is a great question. I will recommend we explore starting from the definition of forgiveness. There are various angles to tackle this question, but I will do my best to keep it simple.

What is forgiveness?

First, let gets to the heart of what we are doing when we forgive. Let’s examine what the word means. You see, forgiveness means different things to different people.

I once made a mistake thinking there was a universal definition of the subject. I was very much surprised to find I was mistaken. I discovered a body of knowledge on the subject. As I studied, I concluded there are different schools of thought on the subject.

For me, forgiveness is a spiritual act. My work is spirituality focus. I want you and I to go on a journey of spirituality growth. The journey supercharged my spirituality growth when I internalised the concept. The journey has the power to ignite a spiritual awakening. But we must understand the definition of the concepts as shared on this blog.

Forgiveness is an act of letting go of the emotions and thoughts of an offence. It is tough to do so when left with the scars of the event. Yet, the scars will not heal whilst forgiveness hasn’t occurred. We cannot change the event that creates the scars. But, we can change our reaction to an event-time is a great healer.

What happens to our inner-consciousness when we forgive someone who hurts us

Through forgiveness, an inner transformation takes place. It starts from the mind, where a willingness to let go begins, followed by the heart. The mind does not heal automatically- for sure. The release of the offensive thoughts must embed. For example, one cannot sow seeds today and expect a harvest tomorrow. There is a process of inner healing that must take place.

What happened in the mind does not enter the heart overnight. It takes time for the reasoning faculty and the heart to align into a positive state. The heart is the emotions, and the mind is the thought pattern. Forgiveness takes place when the heart and the mind transformed in quality of love for the other. It is this love for the other that creates the healing balm. The previous emotional and mental scars heal, and love, compassion and kindness emerge.

Let’s make the connection between spirituality and forgiveness

Until one covers the offence with love and kindness, forgiveness has not taken root in the spirit. The spirit is our attitude towards others. If the attitude is positive, doing good to others, we are in a state of love. Spirituality begins with loving others unconditionally. When we love others unconditionally, we connect to the divine source of life. When we overcome the thoughts of offence, we show love to the forgiven.

Forgiveness heals emotional and mental scars.

I suffered the vice of unforgiveness a few years back. It was no fun place to be. The pain was so severe, leaving me immobile.After forgiving, I transformed . I began planning to help others. I have been through this with many challenges with deep hurt. As soon as one let go, they are free from the pain and can move on. Whilst holding on to the event, the scars worsen and impact all aspects of our lives.

How to forgive someone who hurts you

  • Decide to forgive and develop spiritually. If you do not decide to forgive, nothing will happen.
  • Get help from trusted counsellors if you find it challenging to make the journey. Some things are easier to forgive than others. The deeper the pain, the most likely you will need support and counselling.
  • Seek out resources from our website to learn more about our services. I will recommend ‘The Ultimate Forgiveness Journal For Healing & Harmony’. It sets out how to forgive someone who hurt you.


Forgiveness is a powerful act of love that frees us from negative emotions. It helps both the forgiven and the forgiver move forward positively when done right. The forgiver creates a positive role model for the forgiven. The forgiven learns the power of love through the forgiver. The forgiver gains a new spiritual development and grows in higher consciousness. It is a win-win for all parties.

If you need further assistance with forgiveness, we offer ‘Forgiveness Counselling Session’, ‘Online Training’ and ‘Training Events’.  Sign up for our newsletter to stay in touch with Journals and Events.

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Author: Sara Ahavah